One Jiff

*update: i realise I missed out quite a few things, because I will forever lack mind to hand coordination
but okay, as turning on the computer again has turned out counter productive, waiting for a miracle but it seems like ' tonight's not [my] night' (fear the state of my mental health in regard to my references). Bonne nuit readers.

Two second update as I had to turn the computer on to transfer $25 to my brother:
1. My life is practise exams, I have no other life, I forgotten what it is to lead a life without practise exams
2. Mail, yes it has come :DD
3. I dreamt feverishly about doing physics exams last night, specifically a conservation of energy question
4. My first blood nose yesterday, just sitting in spesh doing my thang, and hello runny nose, wait no, that's blood. It didn't stop for 3 hours...and thankyou Pauline for stating that 'maybe you're dying' and then reassuring me that 'maybe [I'm] not'. Yeah how do you like my quoting skills, just kidding, I have issues with throwing quotes into essays.

Worst of all, that feeling is threatening to crawl out of the recesses of my very soul and eat me :(
What am I meant to do? I don't question it rhetorically I really just want to know.
As no objective view or solution will ever exist, the best I can hope for is to continue at this rate and hopefully not fall on my face.

Here's a shitty analogy, going downhill is not only easier it's faster, but somewhat precarious as once you start, the momentum (oh god physics) builds and BAM, everything's spiraling out of control, and next thing you know you've hit rock bottom, not to mention the injuries incurred along the way. Then it'll take unnecessary effort to get back to even where you started. But I guess it can't always be helped.

NTS; do not, I repeat do NOT over think right now. I can't wait until after next Wednesday to fall into that trap. gnihton si gnihtyreve

Okay five minutes have past, byebye internet. I miss you.
Love Lisa.

PS. I am so sorry everyone and the many facebook messages (from way back) I have not replied to. The internet is the worst distraction of my life so minimalising my usage is my goal for the next 4 days. But my phone is forever and ever and ever on, and I'm pretty sure you know I answer at any time of the night because I can't reject calls.